Mental and Physical Health

When Your Child Faces Depression: A Guide for Parents

 As a parent, it’s one of the most painful things to witness—your child losing joy, struggling to get out of bed, withdrawing from friends and family, or saying things like “I don’t feel like myself anymore.” Depression in children and teens is real, and as both a licensed mental health clinician and a believer in Christ, I want to offer encouragement, truth, and practical guidance from both Scripture and clinical wisdom.

First, know you are not alone. In Scripture, we see many faithful people wrestle with deep emotional pain. David poured out his sorrow in the Psalms: “Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me?” (Psalm 42:11). Depression in children and teens often looks different than it does in adults. It can show up as irritability, withdrawal from family or friends, changes in sleep or appetite, loss of motivation, poor academic performance, or physical complaints like headaches and stomachaches. Some kids may even express hopelessness or thoughts of self-harm. Depression is not a modern invention or a sign of weak faith. It’s a real struggle—one that God sees and cares about. If your child is walking through a season of depression, it doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a parent or that they’ve lost their way spiritually. It means they require compassion, support, and healing.

Begin by cultivating a receptive and affectionate attitude by listening before you speak. One of the best things you can do is create space for your child to talk. Be quick to listen, slow to speak (James 1:19). They may not be able to explain exactly what’s wrong, and that’s okay. What matters most is that your presence makes them feel seen, heard, and safe. Tell them, “You don’t have to go through this alone. I’m with you, and God is with you too.”

Seeking help is a step of faith and wisdom, not a failure. Sometimes, Christian parents hesitate to seek counseling, thinking prayer alone should be enough. Prayer is powerful—and so is wise counsel. Proverbs 15:22 reminds us, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” A Christian counselor can help your child understand their feelings, develop coping tools, and remind them of their identity in Christ. In more serious cases, a pediatrician or psychiatrist may recommend medication. This is not unspiritual. Just as we would treat a physical illness with medicine, we can use the same wisdom when treating mental health struggles.

Promote God’s truth gently. While we should never “Bible-verse” our kids out of pain, we can lovingly remind them of who they are in Christ. That they are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), that nothing can separate them from God’s love (Romans 8:38-39), and that God is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18).

Pray for them often, and pray with them when appropriate. Prayer invites God’s presence into their pain. Pray with your child when they’re open to it and pray for them always. Ask God to bring light into their darkness, peace into their minds, and healing to their hearts. Although not always, the underlying issues are frequently related to strained relationships, possibly dysfunctional family dynamics, a lack of social acceptance, or the absence of a defining characteristic that helps individuals establish their identity among their peers. So much of the human experience is about feeling accepted and finding our “tribe.” Children are confronted with a significantly greater volume of information today, and there is no means of avoiding it. Social media inundates them with messages about their inadequacies, stemming from unrealistic comparisons that pervade all platforms.

There is always hope, and life often takes twists and turns that we are not expecting, but it is amazing how often God shows up in the final hour when we least expect Him. Depression is not the end of the story; God can use all our adversities for His glory. With the right help and God’s healing, your child can come through this stronger, wiser, and more aware of God’s love. Keep walking with them. Keep trusting God’s promises. He is faithful—even in the valley.

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Matthew Knabe, MA, LPCC, is the Director of Operations at Emerge Counseling Ministries and a licensed professional clinical counselor with over a decade of experience in mental health. He earned his master’s degree in Clinical Counseling and Mental Health from Ashland Seminary.Matthew has worked extensively with adolescents, young adults, and adults, seamlessly integrating clinical care with faith-based principles. Before pursuing counseling, he recorded and toured as a musician, including with the Christian band Sonicflood. Currently, he hosts the Experience Emerge (ExEm) podcast, where he explores the intersection of mental health and faith through insightful conversations and perspectives.